Category Archives: grass

How I got the Son of God to cut my grass

Standard

First Text – 2:56 pm:  The grass is looking a little high.  I think it wants a hair cut.

No response from the Son of God…


Second text – 3:42 pm

I guess you missed the mental imagery I was trying to convey in my last text.  Maybe this will help

I guess you missed the mental imagery I was trying to convey in my last text. Maybe this will help

No Response from the Son of God…


Third text – 4:50 pm

Help!!!!!  I've fallen and I can't cut the grass!

Help!!!!! I’ve fallen and I can’t cut the grass!

No Response from the Son of God…


Fourth Text – 6:06 pm

This is a picture of my shed.  What's missing? Answer:  a lawn mower!

This is a picture of my shed. What’s missing?
Answer: a lawn mower!

No Response from the Son of God…


Fifth Text – 6:26 pm

Holy shit!  The grass is threatening to kill itself if it doesn't get a hair cut.  Do you really want this on your hands?

Holy shit! The grass is threatening to kill itself if it doesn’t get a hair cut. Do you really want this on your hands?

The Son of God replies:  Fine Mom…I’ll be there in the morning.